I am starting to have a serious loss of awareness lately. My ability to understand what is going on around me is disappearing. I am unobservant and oblivious to things that are right in front of me.

This is bad, I am scared.

first and it sounds serious; stop with those shroomz

I don't do drugs.

I am afraid that I am never going to grow up and be able to live a life on my own without relying on other people.

all ppl go through different stages in their life. i see it as balck and white stripes: good and bad fases in your life. ppl who say that they was never afraid or never made a mistake or not even felt any remorse for their previous action are liars or mindless fucks
without fear of failure you will never succeed in anything

It isn't disappearing, you are just starting to realize it now.

shock therapy
by which i mean move out (as soon as you can ofc) which will force you do deal with the things
school will also help this as you will be forced to start thinking again

also, stop being so hard on yourself, trust yourself, yet continue to be aware of yourself and your flaws.

Attention to Detail

Get some sleep and eat your favorite food.

If you are not better after that, go to a doctor who is going to tell you got a problem so he gets some money.

Stop drinking.

and yes, you can

stop changing my quotes, it upsets me

ahh, a new challenger appears

what

sounds like ur problem is that ur parents aren't rich. but not everyone can have a perfect life like sgull and i

again, what you need is rich parents

i think i called this when i was at gary's

I wasn't able to articulate my thoughts as well as I would have liked on this subject, but this is not exactly what I meant.

agreed
rich parents can buy you coke and a shrink

What I meant was more along the lines that I am starting to develop strong paranoia lately, whilst completely disregarding any common sense to show me that things are actually fine.

You too, I thought I was only one experiencing this.

hello, its called a normal aspect of life (for those who are smart enough to be introspective) questioning your life, its current situation, the future, how and why etc
trouble is taking it too far and not realizing that things are probably ok as long as you are trying to improve

Now, in hind sight, my actions were actually the right decision, however, I took them to be that of a "pussy", and embarked on some negative self analysis last night.

I am aware that things are on the up & up for myself at the moment. I just don't know how to explain what I need to get off of my chest properly.

This post has been edited by MoS. on Mon - Feb 16 2009 - 18:42:07

I meticulously critique myself, my art, to points of extremes :\
But I know things with get better, the main dilemma is, that are my skills good enough to get a good job/college?
Is my writing good enough to be viable?


etc etc

im not insane im not insane...im not insane im notttt not insane!

insane in the membrane

patrick bateman

feed me a stray cat

im going to cut you open and play with your blood