Three Latvian are brag about sons. "My son is soldier. He have rape as many women as want," say first Latvian.

"Zo?" second say, "My son is farmer. He have all potato he want!"

Third Latvian wait long time, then say, "My son is die at birth. For him, struggle is over."

"Wow! You are win us," say others.

But all are feel sad.

i realize neither of you are latvian but you're the closest thing we have here

so it gets directed at you

Latvian girl is say, "I want go America one day."
Father say, "I send you America."
Daughter is thank father. Make tears of happy. Father use for salty potato.
Father think moment, say, "Daughter, I no send you America."
Potato is more salt.

i'll spare you the rest

just ignore this toilet

NASA is planning mission to Mars.
Chooses two Americans and one Latvian for crew. Reason is budget ran out after first two and Latvian work for potato.
Ship take off but there is problem, food storage sucked into space and all potato is lost.
Americans horrified, they cannot into hunger. Soon die of starvation.
Latvian clearly bothered, is just like home.
Also die of starvation.

i will clearly poop here more of latvian jokes, but this sums most of russian jokes during last 50 or 60 years: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_jokes

LOL

hahahaha

WHAT

A drunkard takes a leak by a lamp pole in the street. A policeman tries to reason with him: "Can't you see the latrine is just 25 feet away?" The drunkard replies: "Do you think I got me a damn fire hose in my pan­ties here?"

The Soviet Union has launched the first man into space. A Ukrainian shepherd, standing on top of a hill, shouts over to another Ukrainian on another hill to tell the news. "Mykola!" / "Yes!" / "The moskali have flown to space!" / "All of them?" / "No, just one." / "So why are you bothering me then?"

Abram cannot sleep, tossing and turning from side to side... Finally his wife Sarah protests: "Abram, what's bothering you?" / "I owe Moishe 20 roubles, but I have no money. What shall I do?" / Sarah bangs on the wall and shouts to the neighbors: "Moishe! My Abram still owes you 20 roubles? Well he isn't giving them back!" Turning to her husband she says: "Now go to sleep and let Moishe stay awake!"

Abram went in synagogue and asks rabbi: "Rebbe, my son became Christian! What should I do?" / "Don't worry, Abram. I'll ask God about it, come back to me tomorrow." At the next day, Abram goes to rabbi again: "So? What God said?" / "I'm sorry, I can't help you. God has the same problem."

A Frenchman, a German, and a Russian go on a safari and are trapped by cannibals. They are brought to the chief, who says, "We are going to eat you right now. But I am a civilized man, I studied human rights at the Patrice Lumumba University in Moscow, so I'll grant each of you a last request." The German asks for a mug of beer and a bratwurst. He gets it, and cannibals eat him. The French asks for three girls. He has crazy sex with them, and then follows the German. The Russian asks: "Hit me hard, right on my nose." The chief is surprised, but hits him. The Russian pulls out a Kalashnikov and shoots all the cannibals. The mortally wounded chief asks him: "Why didn't you do this before we ate the German?", the Russian proudly replies: "Russians are clearly aggressors!"

ive read this about 6 times today, and it still makes me smile