Desolate Carnage
 
I Don't Get It
Archived | Views: 1064 | Replies: 23 | Started 15 years, 5 months ago
 
#553617 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 20:49:27
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I am a good writer.

Whenever I am thinking about my paper/essay topic I craft these perfect ideas/sentences in my head, but when I go to sit down and write I get distracted incredibly easily and the paper ends up must less it it could be.

If I'm writing something on the spot though, like an exam essay I normally do a great job and can focus well.

Any tips from m8s in/after lollege?
 
#553620 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 20:54:39
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Looks like you got the brainstorming phase down. I would just write it all down like you were pressed to do it. And then do no more than three edits to that draft with the last edit being for spelling and grammatical refinement. You may just be doing too many edits and second guessing yourself. Sometimes I write an outline before starting a first draft. And never use passive tense.

There you go, send FPs PLIZ...LOL

This post has been edited by JackRabbitSlim on Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 20:55:12
 
#553621 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 20:56:24
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passive voice is a bitch to get a hang of
 
#553623 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 21:02:46
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Quote (Jp. @ Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 20:56:24)
passive voice is a bitch to get a hang of


You mean avoiding passive voice is a bitch, Right.

Kids passive voice is bad....mmmmmkay
 
#553629 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 21:34:58
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It sounds like you should treat everything you write within reason like an essay. Write it all down like you would ahead of time, then go back to it a day or two later and re-read it to check for any mistakes or what you could add to it. Then get 3-4 other people who are good writers to go over it, and point out things you might of missed.

Peer review is one of the best tools you have when writing papers
 
#553639 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 21:44:18
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Don't strive for perfection, strive for a generic essay answer with a bit of creativity. Too tired to give a tl;dr answer ofc.
 
#553642 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 21:47:23
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separate each sentence into its own line so you can read them individually and change independantly

then whenst done, delete the line breaks to fix formatting
 
#553685 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 22:35:53
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am i supposed to like jp now because hes trusted?
 
#553703 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 22:56:55
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Quote (BBQ @ Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:35:53)
am i supposed to like jp now because hes trusted?


p sure he got rid of raffles
 
#553710 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:05:33
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wheres jp?
sniffin some dudes thong? proalbey
 
#553724 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:19:06
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Quote (randomtask @ Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:56:55)
Quote (BBQ @ Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:35:53)
am i supposed to like jp now because hes trusted?


p sure he got rid of raffles


 
#553777 | Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:46:47
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stop being a huge bitch, and write
 
#553806 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 00:04:49
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Not like it matters for you.

You have rich parents.
 
#554007 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 01:41:42
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Quote (hedonism @ Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:19:06)
Quote (randomtask @ Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:56:55)
Quote (BBQ @ Tue - Jun 9 2009 - 23:35:53)
am i supposed to like jp now because hes trusted?


p sure he got rid of raffles


true
 
#554119 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 07:51:43
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ty ofc

also np np about raffles :donno:
 
#554130 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 09:40:31
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procrastinated like crazy on this one

here is my 45 minute attempt

afk handing this in (just pooping for anyone eho may want to take a look then call me an idiot over mistakes, would be appreciated)

______________________

War is a battle in more than one way. People involved face struggles outside, on the battlefield, but also within themselves. War is a journey, and for all too many people the journey is cut short. The title of Sebastian Barry’s novel, A Long Long Way, is an allusion to the famous World War I song “It’s a Long Way To Tipperary”. In choosing his title Barry does not include the final words “to Tipperary”, and instead repeats the word long. Some people may simply assume that the full title would not fit on the book, or would be too wordy. However, I feel that the title is much more than a witty literary allusion. Barry did not remove and duplicate words just to suit the cover, he modified the title to comply with the complex, morbid plot.

The song “It’s a Long Way To Tipperary” was popularized by the marching troops of World War I. While on their long, exhausting marches from battlefield to battlefield the men would sing the song. It was meant to raise the moral of the troops and to give them new hope for the things to come. The general mood of the lyrics was positive and uplifting, drastically opposed to the carnage that surrounded the men daily.

It's a long way to Tipperary,
It's a long way to go.
It's a long way to Tipperary
To the sweetest girl I know! (W)

This excerpt from the lyrics shows that Tipperary was a goal. It was a reminder that Tipperary, a town in south-west Ireland (though it can be interpreted as a generic idea of home) was there waiting for them. To the men, a return to Tipperary meant an end to the fighting, suffering, and war. The men sung the song reminding them that the “sweetest girl I know” is back at home, awaiting their return. Unlike the song, A Long Long Way is not an uplifting lyric. The novel tells the story of Willie Dunne, a private in the Irish army. Unable to please his father, being several inches too short to join the police force, Willie decides to enlist and fight with the Allies in World War I. His story, told in A Long Long Way is not a tale of work and reward, or of conflict and resolution. Willie's journey was not destined to end with "the sweetest girl I know" back in Tipperary.

For Willie, his final outcome would be death. The story was about his journey, but not toward Tipperary. It was his journey to his father's love, to Gretta's heart, and to the life of his friends. During the story he loses everything important to him. He loses his self-respect when he sleeps with a prostitute, he loses his father's love when he sympathizes with the Irish rebels, and he loses Gretta's heart when she discovers that he has been unfaithful. Finally, while singing a Christmas song, Willie loses his life.

"Will you forgive me, Willie? Forgive an old man stuck in other days." (291) These words, written by his father, and not read until after Willie's death were the only source of redemption that Willie would have had. Willie lived and died in the shadow of his father's disappointment. This letter was his Tipperary, it was the goal. It was the happiness and forgiveness that he yearned for.

A Long Long Way is not a story about a goal. Sebastian Barry does not want the reader's attention to be focused on the idea of a "Tipperary". He does not want to convey the story of a man overcoming his difficulties and reaching a happy ending, because in most cases of war there is no happy ending. The song was sung to raise moral and give the men hope. It did not provide a realistic account if what the men represented or the conditions in which they lived and fought. A Long Long Way is meant to represent the true life of an Irish soldier, hard, demoralizing, and disgraceful. It was the opposite of the song. Barry wanted his work to focus on the journey, the "long way", so there was no need to include the words "To Tipperary" in the title.

Willie Dunne does not survive his journey. For Willie Dune, as well as millions of other troops, there was no Tipperary. If the words were included into the title the novel would immediately start off an an unrealistic account of World War I. Willie's journey was long and tireless. To illustrate the importance of the journey, not of the goal Sebastian Barry duplicated the word "long" in the title. It immediately told the reader that this was not going to be a fun, exciting adventure story where Willie would emerge a hero, but it would be the tale of a long struggle with no happy ending. The lack of an ending (to Tipperary) even foreshadowed Willie's eventual death.

War, regardless of how you look at it, never has a happy ending. In World War I millions of lives were lost, millions of families ruined. All war can be viewed as nothing more then a long long way, a long journey toward nothing. There was no goal, no pursuit of happiness on the front lines or in the trenches. A man can give all he has to the war effort, but the grim reality is; he can be killed and forgotten in an instant. Willie Dunne was a victim of war. He fought for a country that turned its back on him. He did his best, but in the end he was killed and "They went on without him". (292).

 
#554134 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 10:07:06
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stop switching tenses
 
#554181 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 13:22:18
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You write better then I do but your sentences don't flow very well.
 
#554188 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 13:44:10
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tl;dr
 
#554190 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 13:57:30
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p1u5 0n3
 
#554192 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 14:00:12
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p1u5 0n3
 
#554193 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 14:00:31
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p1u5 0n3
 
#554194 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 14:01:09
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p1u5 0n3
 
#554284 | Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 17:51:20
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Quote (randomtask @ Wed - Jun 10 2009 - 13:44:10)
tl;dr


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